Disco Inferno Failure

As I sit at my childhood desk in the beautiful Arizona, I reflect upon my first full day back on the home front. Upon my arrival I was greeted by blue skies, sun shining and civil engineering that made sense. Freeways have speed limits that are at least 60 MPH, all surface roads are perpendicular and are rarely one way streets. To celebrate my mom’s birthday we ate at a phenomenal restaurant that is the epitome of a “dining experience”. If you are ever in the Grand Canyon state I insist that you carve out a solid two and half hours and dine at Binkley’s. Today began just as sunshiny as yesterday, but soon, the unicorns and rainbows disappeared.

Whenever I am home, my parents are always generous enough to me get a week pass for the Village. It is my parent’s health club and when they ask nicely, the Village allows us children to return and embrace healthy lifestyles. After checking out their extensive online schedule (wasn’t feeling Pilates Barre, Crossfit, Fluid Fusion or Kinesis) so I stuck with what I know – spinning. Opting for the 60 minute Cycle to the Rhythm I arrived early, snagged my bike and set up. To start with the positives, instead of traditional lighting there were black lights which I like because they make me look tan and my teeth nice and white. Nice lights, smooth ride on the bikes, a comfortable saddle and the room was nice and warm so sweating out last night’s dinner wasn’t going to be an issue.

Positives aside, the music would have made my parents super happy. It was basically the soundtrack to Saturday Night Fever with some questionable house music mixed in. Now Disco Inferno and Boogie Nights wouldn’t have been an issue if the class had any coordination with the beat of the music. Vince, the instructor, had us doing the same 4 minute interval for the entire class. Never once was there a queue to match pedal strokes to the music and apparently when he said the number 3, that meant for us to speed up which I would have known if there was ever an explanation. To give Vince the benefit of the doubt, it certainly seemed that most people had been to his class at least once before. My assumption is that they understood his somewhat spastic instruction and inclination to yell despite the fact that his microphone was functioning on all cylinders.

Did I sweat, yes. Did I work hard, yes (thanks to my own tension increase since Vince only suggested we do so every 30 minutes). Will I be going back to Vince’s class this week or ever again, no. I will use my 10 day mooch pass to explore the other instructors and classes that the Village has to offer. It is supposed to be 80 and sunny this week, maybe I will get into Fluid Fusion(trendy water aerobics)? Mariah swears by it.

 I wore all black today. I am switching over my wardrobe to only black exercise clothing with the occasional neon accessory.



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